With the recent \"surprise\" announcement that Sarah Palin will not run for president, she is saying to everyone in America who has donated money to her:

SUCKERS! You just got Punk’d!

She does thank you however for her steak dinners, her hotel and airfare upgrades, her vacations, etc… She appreciates Americans sending her money so she can live high on the hog and contribute nothing to the debate or society except spending your money!

Andy Borowitz had the best take on this whole ridiculous non-story!

Former Alaska Governor Sarah Palin told reporters today that she would not run for President because “I want to go straight to the quitting part.”

“If I launched a campaign, let’s face it, a couple of months from now I’d up and quit,” she said. “This is a real step-saver for all concerned.”

She said that prior to her decision she had seriously considered running, “but only for the free clothes.”

When asked about her future plans, she said, “Although I’m not running for President, I have no intention of spending more time with my family.”

Although, I have to admit that I admire the way she soaked every last cent she could get out of the right wing and the tea partiers, hopefully I will never write, mention, say, or think of Sarah again!

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