Somehow, Speaker Mike Johnson Has NO Bank Accounts! He’s just a man of modest means…

Now that he’s been elected Speaker of the House, Louisiana Republican Representative Mike Johnson has come under new and deeper scrutiny. And it has been reported that he hasn’t listed any bank accounts on his federal financial disclosures. And this past weekend, when asked about it, Speaker Johnson said it was because he was a man of modest means. Well, horse hockey. Step back a moment and think about your life in the 21st Century and how you handle your finances…and now…continue->

So if Mike Johnson has no bank accounts:

On the first of each month does he go down to the bank and pay his mortgage in cash? Or does he lease? In that case does his landlord provide the quaint last century convenience of showing up at his door to collect the rent in person, in cash?

And he goes down to the electric company and pays in cash? Same thing at the same with gas? or sewer and water?

How did he pay for is Taylor Swift tickets earlier this year?

How does he pay for his airfare when he heads home to Louisiana from D.C. when the House is on break? I don’t think Travelocity takes cash.

Does he walk down to the Spectrum store to pay his internet/cable bill? We know he has internet because he monitors his porn usage! (well actually he’s savvy enough to watch porn only on the computer in the speaker’s office)

Or does he just get money orders at Walmart like the rest of us?

And how does he get paid? Does he stand in line at the payroll window in the Capitol every Friday and then run down the street to the check cashing place?? Or does he get an envelope of crispy greenbacks from the feds? Gotta watch that, it may look suspicious, aina? And we know how the feds prefer refunding tax over payments and paying social security benefits by electronic fund transfer. I can’t imagine what it costs them to cut a check nowadays?

I would suspect that Speaker Johnson’s claim to not have any bank accounts is a lie but for the moment I’ll just call it an oversight. After all Republicans rely on big time lawyers and accountants to handle their money, i.e. Eric Trump. Or is there just a bag man from some rich donor taking care of the speaker’s business.


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